Light of Heart

This unfinished translation of Misao Sena's fanfiction was done by Issendai.

"Light of Heart" takes place at the end of Kingdom Hearts, and is therefore rich and spoilerful. If you want to know what's going on, highlight this paragraph and read an essential spoiler: When Riku tries to leave Maleficent's side, Anthem possesses him and attacks Sora wearing his body. Riku himself is barely conscious and manages to surface briefly during the climax. Spoiler end.


For example, the bottom of the infinite darkness.
The unending, eternal darkness of the abyss.

Your heart illuminates me.
Your thoughts guide me.

Light.
Your light.
Come, tell me my destination.

* * *--------------------------------* * *

In the thick, gloomy blackness.
My body does nothing but fall.
Engulfed in the jet-black darkness, the fragments of my memory are crumbling and spilling away.
Things that I can't forget.
Things that I don't want to forget.
All of these the darkness steals away.

I don't want to lose them.
Snatched away against my will----

"So... ra..."

Sude ni (already, too late) ***while calling this name
When I woke up, Sora was not at my side. How anxious was he?
He probably wouldn't cry, would he?
He probably wouldn't get hurt?
Because I have to protect Sora, the crumbling terror which dogs my steps pins me down against my will.
Because I must search--I have already vowed that, above everything else.
****And however long I have to spend simply finding a single person.****
The one person on whom I have risked everything without a single regret.

Even though that's so...
Now, when I look at the far bank, which is completely enshrouded in haze, my memories become opaque.
Even though they are transparent.
Even though they are very important, even though I don't want to lose them.
Why does my body simply snatch even that from me?

"So... ra..."

Darkness.
In darkness.
The bottom of the darkness.
If you aren't here, I won't be able to breathe.
Why aren't you before my eyes...?

"Riku----?"

My consciousness is dissolved/melted in the darkness.
It senses itself being slightly withdrawn.
I seem to hear a voice.
It seems that I can hear your voice...?

"Riku, hey, wake up!"

If I can wake up, I will.
But my body stopped moving a long time ago.
Dyed in darkness down to the fingertips, I cannot move so much as a finger of my own will.
Even the extent to which I can stay conscious--I don't know.

Even though I don't want to lose it.*
****

"Riku, geeze! Can you hear me? Isn't Riku speaking to me?"

"I am, and Riku is. We two are alive together, so Riku is speaking to you, isn't he?"

So.
I want to live.
I want to keep living with you.
I want to keep walking the same road.
But, still...

"Deceiver! That's not like Riku! That's not like Riku at all!"

Urged on by Sora's voice, I desperately stretched out my unmoving fingertip.
Certainly it happens, but it doesn't feel like me.
Somehow, my fingertip moves.
My arm raises.
My eyelids, which feel as though they are being crushed by gravity, open.

"What are you going to do, since you won't attack me?"

Attack.
Being as defeated as I am is unbearably ugly.
Isn't it, Sora?

"It's obvious!"

In darkness.
My body, as I rise to the surface by chance.
As I continue to fall, my soul turns its face up.
The hand of the darkness which has entwined my insides gradually releases me.
And a voice reaches me from far away.

"It's this way, Riku."

The voice is light.
You guide me.

For example, the bottom of the infinite darkness.
The unending, eternal darkness of the abyss.

Your heart illuminates me.
Your thoughts guide me.

Light.
Your light.
Come, tell me my destination.

Now. In this very moment.
Is Sora near me--?
All of my memories are vague, and I'm still opaque.
He isn't hurt?
He's not crying?
He's alone, but he's all right?

"I'm okay..."

Slowly, the light becomes increasingly brilliant.
In the midst of the death-black darkness, Sora's light shines out and illuminates me.

"Our hearts, they're linked, you know. That's why I'm all right."

"So... ra..."

"My heart was always inside Riku."

"So wake up!"

 

Sora's voice.
It awakens me.

That is my light.
My absolutely unlosable light.


* Afterword *

This is set just before the last battle at the Hollow Bastion.
It's Riku's frame of mind at the time of that event. (laughs)
But after this comes the start of the counterattack. It's like, Don't reach out your hand to my Sora! (laughs)

I can't translate the rest of the afterword. The gist of her remarks are: She reeeeeeeeeally likes Riku x Sora, and Riku is her favorite.

* This line plays with the verb ending: "Ushinaitaku, nai no ni." "Even though I want... don't want to lose it."

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